A Hole in my Pants

I've realised that I have neglected this blog the last month or so.

My friend asked me how the opposite blog was going. I had to admit that I hadn't been concentrating on it.

As I said at the beginning, it is going to be a challenge to remember about The Opposite for the next year.

Anyway, I've decided to send a daily update to my friend and from that update I will try to publish this blog.

Let me tell you what happened and how I did the opposite yesterday.

I was walking to the library after finishing at the gym and everything seemed great if a little hot.

I sat down at the library and started doing my work and then I noticed something a bit strange. What i found was that I had a big hole in the crotch of my trousers went went around to the back. I don't think the hole was obvious but it still was a little disconcerting that I thought about going home to change my pants.

In the end I didn't do that. I did the opposite, borrowed a stapler, stapled the holes together and went about my day. At times I could feel a staple breaking but it worked and I wasn't too worried about it.

Another thing that I noticed yesterday is that no one cares about your hole in your pants. They aren't looking anyway. Most people are looking down at their phones or looking down at the floor or ground walking. They are too worried about themselves to worry about a hole in the pants.

I'm glad that I did the opposite yesterday and made the most of my day.

Social Media and always checking it

I don't know about you, but I am addicted to my phone. At the moment, as I am writing this, I am listening to music played on YouTube through my phone. I also like to check other things including social media like Facebook and Instagram.

This is a big waste of my time when I could be focusing.

I remember reading a book in which the author suggests turning off the notifications function on your phone so that you are not distracted. I did this and I found that I was always checking every three seconds to see if I got a text or not. It's ridiculous.

So, today's opposite challenge is to stop checking my phone. The idea is to have one time in the day when I check Facebook and Instagram. That's all.

If I can do this, I'm going to find that I have a lot more time to do things that are truly important.

Can you cut it down to one time a day too?

Good luck!

Going to a Party

Last night I went to a party. I haven't been to one for quite a long time and this for me is certainly an example of me doing the opposite.

For those of you who know me well, you will know that I would classify myself as an introvert and a party, especially with people you don't know at all would not be the introvert's natural environment.

Anyway, I went along and it was fun. I had to speak in Japanese for most of it which was interesting as I haven't done that for quite some time but that wasn't a problem.

This is certainly an example of doing the opposite for me and my plan for the next twelve months is to attend more and more of these events.

What is out of your comfort zone?

Go and do it!

Come on! Go and do the opposite. I will.

TINDER

If you are single and unless you are living under a rock you have probably heard of Tinder. Tinder is the dating app, that allows you to swipe right if you like the look of what is on the screen and swipe left if what you see or in some cases read is not exactly what you are looking for.

Yep, some people love it and some people hate but what is undeniable is that it has made a big impact in the dating scene over the last four or five years.

I have used it on a number of occasions in which I will use it for a few weeks and then delete it and then come back and use it after a few months.

What has this got to do with The Opposite?

Well, I have been using recently and what I have discovered (I actually knew a long time ago) is that it is relatively easy to get a woman to agree to meet with you. The difficult part is getting to meet her.

I'll run through a scenario. You swipe right on a woman's profile and to your surprise she has swiped right on yours. You have a match. If you are anything like me, you will probably write straight away. (To be honest, I never understand the theory you have to wait for so many hours in case you come across as needy. Bullshit!)

Anyway, you get a reply in a timely manner and you reply and you have a good conversation and then after a while (not too long) you ask her out and I find that it is usually yes. You arrange a time, maybe a week later and tell her that you will get back to her with a time and place.

When you get back to her, you get an excuse, I can't get out of a work thing or my budgie died or something.

To be fair, usually I will get another time from them which is a good sign but if your schedule doesn't allow it then that's it.

What I have found on Tinder if either party postpones or cancels the initial time, then it is highly unlikely that it will ever happen.

Anyway, that is enough of my rant and let me go back to the original question and what has this got to do with The Opposite?

Well, I have deleted Tinder and I will not go back to it for a year. This is the opposite of what I usually do and you can ask me about it

No more Tinder or dating apps for me. If I want to meet someone, I have to do it the old-fashioned way. This is The Opposite.

To cancel or not to cancel: That is the question

Doing the opposite can be difficult for many people and I tell you what, it is a challenge and a half at the best of times.

This morning I joined the 6.15am class at the Crossfit gym that I attend. There is no apparent reason for me to do this as I don't have to be anywhere early in the day but I just wanted to challenge myself.

I think the secret of going to an early morning workout is not getting up early but going to bed early. As long as your head hits the pillow at a reasonable hour, then you can get up quite early, especially in the summer. It might be a little more difficult in the winter where naturally, the warm blankets are a better option.

Anyway, what does this have to do with doing the opposite. Well, I went to bed last night and I was considering changing my booking from the 6.15am class to the 7.30am class.

I'm glad I didn't because:

1. Normally I would have.

2. I was able to enjoy my 15 minute walk to the station in nice weather and that allowed me to prepare for the workout ahead.

3. It shows me that the opposite is working

4. I created some more time for myself today.

There you go. Another example of doing the opposite.

What are you going to do the opposite of today?

Discipline

The Opposite is all about discipline. Forgoing those instant pleasures for long-term gain. It is about eating that salad instead of that large pizza even though it looks absolutely delicious. 

You and I have a decision. What are you going to do? Will you make the long-term discipline decision or the short-term instant gratification decision?

Do the opposite?

BEING ABLE TO SAY "NO"

Part of the strategy of "doing the opposite" is having the ability to say no. This is basically sacrificing things that you would usually do or things that give you comfort as opposed to doing things that you should do.

Let me give you an example:

It's 5pm on a Saturday afternoon. What do you do? Do you accept the invitation to hang out and have a few beers or do you stay at the library/home office/shared work space to finish the little project that you have?

I know what I would do. Yes! I would go and have those beers. But the opposite suggests that that is the worst thing to do. The opposite is to say "no" and to work on that project and if you really needed that beer, then maybe you can go at 8pm or 9pm but you have work to do first.